Long Time No See No Hear......

Its been awhile...hell knows... been quite tied up. Doing what?? Well sitting here in this unknown country, playing the role of perfect mother and wife, watching time fly by my window....... wondering what am I doing here?? Days are short...... Darkness prevails; gets me cold feet.
Caught up between indecisiveness and melancholy my heart yearns for more; I know not what. But this I guess is my human nature. Sometimes I feel I land up myself in a fools paradise. So what?? I say to myself.. everybody is not equiped with a safe pair of hands and besides that I do not want to be one. I cannot forecast to you my actions. It is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma; but perhaps there is a key. That key is "state of mind". Getting over it has been my strong virtue and pessimism my worst enemy. What the f..k, I am here, living an American life!!! Nothing but the best for me!! There you go again....... you know where???? Well girl, paddle your own canoe, you have made it till here or till now. The road ahead is worth discovering.
You will eat, bye and bye,
In that glorious land above the sky;
Work and pray, live on hay,
You'll get pie in the sky when you die.